The Value of the Funeral
In considering the cost of a funeral, we should not lose sight of the value of the funeral and what it ultimately provides for us.
Over the years, the newspapers and other media have sometimes been critical of the costs of funerals. These stories have dealt exclusively with the costs of funerals, ignoring the intrinsic value of the funeral itself. As a society, we easily find value in weddings and other ceremonies and consequently have no problem in justifying the costs. The value of a funeral as a ceremony is just as important. At a fundamental level, funerals serve an imperative role in helping the family and friends of the deceased to cope with the loss.
As rational beings, we need to establish the significance of an event before we can begin to establish closure. Through funerals we establish the personal and social significance of our loved one. We need to acknowledge the loss and put it into perspective before we can grieve. Recounting our memories of an individual, establishing who they were and what they meant to us is necessary for us to be able to move on.
Every aspect of a funeral has a purpose and the potential to heal. The presentation of flowers or donations made in the name of the deceased helps us establish and appreciate the effect the individual had on other's lives. Viewing the body of a loved one is the best way family and friends can face reality and begin the process of acceptance. The funeral ceremony itself is also vital; ceremonies often speak for us when we are unable to speak for ourselves. When we are upset and can't put our thoughts and feelings into words, ceremonies provide that means of expression.
The cost of a funeral should always be within the family's ability to pay, while reflecting the family's lifestyle. In considering the cost of a funeral, we should not lose sight of the value of the funeral and what it ultimately provides for us.
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